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We take this matter very seriously and urge all our valued customers to exercise caution and avoid interacting with AllModern-Sale.com aka retrogamingofdenver-sale.com. It is essential to protect yourself from potential scams and fraudulent schemes. We recommend purchasing Retro Gaming products directly from our official website or other trusted local or online retailers to ensure authenticity and quality.
Please help us spread the word and share this post to raise awareness among fellow Retro Gaming enthusiasts. Let’s work together to combat scams and protect our community!
If you have any questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to reach out to us directly via email at legal@retrogamingofdenver.com or by calling our customer support hotline at 303-625-7433.
Thank you for your continued support and trust in Retro Gaming of Denver. Stay safe, stay vigilant!
BELOW IS A SNAP SHOT OF THE VIDEO THAT A FELLOW CUSTOMER SENT TO US THAT WAS POSTED AS A PAID AD ON FACEBOOK. THE PERSON SHOWN IN THE PHOTO HAS BEEN IDENTIFIED AND IS NOT PART OF THE SCAM HIS PHOTO WAS LIFTED ALSO FROM THE SCAMMERS
Throughout history, every new medium has been met with some level of resistance from the previous generations. When advances in printing technology made books more accessible to the common people, scholars decried the fact that the young people of the time were walking around with their faces buried in a book. It’s simply human nature for older generations to be wary of anything new. Video games are no exception. While they are more mainstream and common than ever, anyone who has been gaming since childhood has probably heard certain claims from a concerned adult in their life.
While many vague claims have been spouted by parental figures about how video games will affect the development and behaviors of their children, this article will focus on three of the most common claims and examine whether they have any merit:
“They rot your brain”
“They waste your time”
“They make you aggressive and violent”
“Video Games Will Rot Your Brain”
Out of the three claims, this is by far the most ridiculous and offensive to me. Many of the same people who make this assertion will gladly spend an entire evening watching a marathon of sitcom episodes, or blaze through a crime novel for 8 hours straight. Most other forms of entertainment are passive experiences; while you can try to guess where the story will go, nothing you do in a typical movie, TV show, or book will alter the outcome in any way. If you leave them on, the plots of movies and shows will continue to progress even if no one is in the room to observe them.
Video games, on the other hand, require player input to progress. Many of them require gaining skill and knowledge to progress. Some require overcoming significant challenges or solving difficult puzzles. Regardless of the type of game, almost all of them require some amount of mental focus and hand-eye coordination. Now, skills learned in games aren’t necessarily directly transferable to real life applications - you’re probably not an expert power washer just because you put a lot of hours into PowerWash Simulator - but studies indicate that people who game regularly have high neuroplasticity, which can result in improved learning ability, better problem solving skills, and overall better brain health. So, the reality is pretty much the opposite of this claim.
“Video Games are a Waste of Time”
ALL forms of entertainment are in some way a waste of time. By its very nature, entertainment is a form of escapism; it’s a temporary reprieve from reality. That being said, any form of well-crafted art has the potential to spark thought and discussion, impress new ideas, and teach lessons through examples. Video games are no exception. In some ways, the experiences provided by video games can be even more impactful and personal because of the investment and level of immersion they offer. If you enjoyed your time with a game and came away from it with pleasant memories, I don’t know how it could possibly be called a waste of time.
Video game addiction, however, is a real and serious problem. Being so engrossed in a game that it interferes with your responsibilities, relationships, or health is a destructive pattern. As with most things in life, moderation and balance is key.
“Video Games Make People Violent and Aggressive”
This topic is a bit loaded, so I will try to tread carefully. The prevalence of violence in games and its real effect on culture and behavior is too broad for this article. While I personally think the industry’s over-reliance on using violence and physical conflict to drive gameplay is problematic and creatively lazy, there have been numerous studies that have failed to prove that violent video games directly correlate with real-world violence. Regardless of what your thoughts are on violence in games, the reality is that not all games are violent. More than ever, players have a multitude of choices when selecting games. And for all of their faults, ratings organizations like the ESRB strive to make it easy for players and parents of players to see what type of content is in a game at a glance. If a parent or guardian wants to be selective about what their child is exposed to, the onus is on them to do their research, be cognizant about what their kids are playing, and properly instill in them their values and their reasons for having them. But writing off an entire art form that your child is interested in simply because you disapprove of a few specific examples of it is simply unreasonable.
There is a vast selection of high-quality games available that pretty much no one would find objectionable. The internet famously had fun with the idea that a Doom and an Animal Crossing game were both released at the same time. There’s room in the industry for all types of tastes. Again, being balanced and informed is key.
Hey there, fellow gamers! Ready to level up your knowledge on all things PS Vita? Strap in, because today we're diving deep into the mysterious world of the flashing red light when charging your beloved handheld console. Get ready for some electrifying insights!
Flashing Red Light: The Enigma Unveiled 🎮💡
Picture this: you plug in your trusty PS Vita, eager to embark on a gaming adventure, only to be greeted by an enigmatic red light show. Fear not, my friends, for we are about to decode this puzzling phenomenon!
Power Play: The Battery Dance ⚡💃
When your PS Vita's battery is running low, it enters charging mode. As it replenishes its power, a flashy red light will start pulsating, letting you know it's hard at work. Think of it as a little power dance, getting ready to bring your gaming sessions back to life.
The Waiting Game: Patience is Key ⌛🕹️
Now, here's a pro tip: patience is the name of the game when it comes to charging your PS Vita. It's normal for that red light to keep flashing for a while, especially if your battery was completely drained. So, sit back, relax, and let the charging magic happen!
Troubleshooting Tactics: When in Doubt, Reboot! 🔄🛠️
If that red light just won't quit, don't panic! Try giving your PS Vita a good old reboot. Simply hold down the power button for a few seconds, then release it and power it back on. This quick fix often does the trick and gets your console back on track.
Power Surge: The Final Level-Up ⚡🚀
Congratulations, my gaming gurus! You are now armed with the knowledge to conquer the flashing red light mystery on your PS Vita. Remember, it's all part of the charging process, and with a little patience and a reboot here and there, you'll be back to gaming glory in no time.
So, next time you witness that captivating red light show, embrace it as a sign of your console's thirst for power. Get ready to immerse yourself in epic gaming adventures and conquer new virtual worlds with your fully charged PS Vita! Happy gaming, my friends! 🎮✨
Are you ready to embark on a nostalgic journey through the pixelated wonders of the past? Brace yourself, because Retro Gaming of Denver is here to take you on an epic adventure!
In a world dominated by high-tech consoles and mind-blowing graphics, it's easy to forget the humble beginnings of the gaming industry. But fear not, fellow gamers, because retro gaming is making a triumphant comeback!
Picture this: a room filled with the mesmerizing glow of vintage arcade machines, the sound of quarters clinking, and the exhilaration of mastering classic games. It's a gaming paradise that transcends time and brings back the joy of simpler days.
At Retro Gaming of Denver, we are passionate about preserving the golden age of gaming. Our collection boasts a treasure trove of iconic consoles like the Atari 2600, Nintendo Entertainment System, and Sega Genesis. Get ready to relive the magic of Super Mario Bros., Pac-Man, and Sonic the Hedgehog – the legends that shaped the gaming landscape.
But why is retro gaming gaining such momentum? Well, it's not just about the nostalgia factor. It's about rediscovering the pure essence of gaming, where imagination and skill triumph over flashy graphics. It's about the sheer joy of challenging your friends to a heated match of Street Fighter II or collaborating to save Princess Zelda from the clutches of evil.
Retro gaming is a celebration of the classics, a rebellion against the mainstream, and a reminder that gaming is meant to be fun above all else. It's an escape from the complexities of modern life, where you can immerse yourself in a world where pixels rule and creativity knows no bounds.
So, dust off your old cartridges, grab your trusty joystick, and join us on this epic adventure. Retro gaming is making a comeback, and we're inviting you to be a part of the revolution. Let's relive the glory days and create new memories that will stand the test of time.
Are you ready to press start? Let the retro gaming revival begin!
Hey there, fellow gamers! Are you ready to dive into the mesmerizing world of PlayStation Vita? We know you're itching to find out which model boasts that stunning OLED screen. Well, grab your controllers and get ready for an epic gaming adventure as we unveil the ultimate answer!
Introducing our electrifying blog post: "Which PS Vita Has the OLED Screen? Get Your Game Face On!" We've got all the juicy details you need to know, so you can make the most informed decision and take your portable gaming experience to the next level.
Let's start with the OG, the PlayStation Vita PCH-1000. This bad boy is equipped with a jaw-dropping OLED screen that will make your eyes pop with vibrant colors and razor-sharp visuals. It's like having a miniaturized gaming powerhouse in the palm of your hand!
Next up, we have the PlayStation Vita PCH-2000, the slimmed-down sibling of the PCH-1000. While it doesn't sport the OLED screen, don't let that dim your excitement! With its LCD display, this sleek beast still delivers top-notch graphics and an immersive gaming experience that will leave you breathless.
So, which PS Vita should you choose? Well, it all depends on your gaming preferences and budget. If you crave that mind-blowing OLED goodness, the PCH-1000 is your go-to. But if you're looking for a more budget-friendly option that still packs a punch, the PCH-2000 is here to save the day!
No matter which PS Vita you opt for, one thing's for sure: you're in for an unforgettable gaming journey. So, grab your favorite titles, charge up those batteries, and prepare to embark on a portable gaming adventure like no other!
Stay tuned for more gaming tips, tricks, and epic battles in our gaming blog. Level up your knowledge and join the gaming revolution with us! 🎮💥
P.S. Don't forget to share this blog post with your fellow gamers. They'll thank you for it! 😉
Welcome to the ultimate gamer's guide on how to conquer the pesky problem of your GameCube not reading discs! 🎮💥 Don't let this setback interrupt your gaming adventures. We've got your back with some epic troubleshooting tips that'll have you back in action in no time. Let's dive in! 🌊
🔍 Investigate the Culprit:
First things first, let's check those discs! Give 'em a quick wipe down with a soft cloth to remove any smudges or fingerprints. You'd be amazed at how often this simple trick saves the day! 💪
🚀 Blast Off with a Cleaning Kit:
If your discs are sparkling clean but the issue persists, it's time to level up your cleaning game! Grab a GameCube cleaning kit and blast away any dust or debris that might be lurking inside your console. It's like giving your GameCube a refreshing spa day! 🧼💦
🔄 Master the Art of Disc Insertion:
Believe it or not, there's a technique to inserting discs into your GameCube. Make sure you're set them in gently, using a straight and steady motion. Avoid any fancy tricks like spinning or twirling the disc (we know it's tempting, but trust us!). 💫
🔌 Power Up Your Connections:
Check those cables, gamers! Make sure all the cords connecting your GameCube are snugly plugged in. Sometimes a loose connection can be the sneaky culprit behind disc reading issues. 💥
🛠️ Level-Up Your Skills with Service:
If all else fails, it might be time to call in the experts. Reach out to our awesome customer support team for some pro advice or to set up a repair. They'll have your GameCube back to its full glory in no time! 🌟
Remember, fellow gamers, perseverance is key! Don't let a little disc reading hiccup stop you from conquering new levels and epic quests. With these tips in your arsenal, you'll be back to gaming greatness in a flash! Happy gaming! 🎮🌟
I wish I could tell you more about this one, but I honestly don’t know how to identify a single thing I’m seeing.
Spider-Man (2000)
Spider-Man’s well-toned caboose is visible for the first time in full 3D.
Spider-Man 2: The Sinister Six (2001)
One out of the like 20 games and movies called “Spider-Man 2”.
Spider-Man 2: Enter Electro (2001)
See? Here’s another. Did you know that if you disable the 30 minute timer on the demo disc with an Action Replay, the entire game is actually playable?
Spider-Man (2002)
Based on that shiny new movie at the time, but with less of Tobey’s cry face.
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
IT’S PIZZA TIME.
Ultimate Spider-Man (2005)
It’s still pizza time, but the pizza is now black and slimy.
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
We have run out of pizza.
Spider-Man: Friend or Foe (2007)
Spidey rehabilitates his greatest enemies by punching them really hard, making them his friends. A great time for children, packed with life lessons.
Spider-Man: Web of Shadows (2008)
It’s actually really good if you ignore all of the stuff in it that is bad.
Spider-Man: Shattered Dimensions (2010)
The dimension-hopping story of this game may have kicked off the trends that led to us getting the Spider-Verse movies. That alone makes it the best video game of all time, even though the game itself is just kind of okay.
Spider-Man: Edge of Time (2011)
Half the Spider-Men = Half the Fun. Did a switcheroo on the voice actors for the Spider-Men and just assumed we wouldn’t notice.
The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)
Marketed as a sequel story to the film. All events in the game are then promptly ignored or actively contradicted by the actual sequel film. Webs do not attach to buildings. Justified if you just assume that Spider-Man has a team of construction crane operators swinging the crane arms just out of sight above him, like that one scene in the movie.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)
Another Spider-Man 2. Marginally better swinging compared to the first. Marginally worse in every other regard. Kind of like the movies themselves.
Marvel’s Spider-Man (2018)
The biggest, fanciest, highest-fidelity pizza you’ve ever had.
Marvel’s Avengers (2020)
Everyone got mad that Spider-Man was exclusive to the PlayStation version, but then they got over it because nothing about this game was all that fun anyway.
Marvel’s Spider-Man: Mile Morales (2020)
Yes, leftover pizza is still very, very good.
Marvel’s Spider-Man Remastered (2020)
Nice try, but this doesn’t count as a new game just because it added ray tracing. Please disregard this section and strike it from your memory.
Marvel’s Spider-Man 2 (2023)
Gee whiz, how’d you come up with that name? For real, though, this looks really, really good and October cannot come soon enough.
Interested in checking out some of the wall-crawler’s video game back catalog? Check out our selection of retro games and consoles to get started.
In the ever-evolving world of video games, developers try to breathe new life into beloved titles through modern remakes, there are instances where the original releases continue to stand the test of time.
We’ll look at three iconic titles and explore what made the originals so special, the allure of their remakes, and ultimately why, for some fans, the originals still are so much better than the remakes.
Capcom's iconic survival horror franchise, Resident Evil, starting in 1996, brought a unique brand of terror to the world of gaming. With its cinematic approach to storytelling, spine-tingling suspense, and unrelenting dread, "Resident Evil" became a household name among gamers.
As the series evolved, each installment offered a fresh take on the genre, but it was "Resident Evil 2" that became a standout masterpiece. Released in 1998, it followed the escape efforts of rookie cop Leon S. Kennedy and Claire Redfield in the infested streets of Raccoon City. Its dual-character perspective, maps, and gruesome encounters with zombies and bio-organic monstrosities made it an instant classic.
"Resident Evil 2" was universally loved, even praised, for its atmospheric tension, intricate puzzles, and memorable characters. It struck a perfect balance between horror and action, cementing its status as one of the most beloved entries in the series.
Now, fast forward to 2019 when Capcom unveiled the "Resident Evil 2" remake. Anticipation was sky-high, and while the game received critical acclaim, some die-hard fans couldn't help but feel that it lacked the same magic as the original. Perhaps it's the nostalgia that colors our perception, but for many, the 1998 version of "Resident Evil 2" remains an unparalleled classic that captures the essence of survival horror like no other.
Few games in the annals of gaming history elicit the kind of profound nostalgia and adoration that "Final Fantasy VII" does. Released in 1997 by Square Enix (then Square Soft), this monumental RPG masterpiece revolutionized the genre and left an indelible mark on gamers around the world. Its sprawling narrative, captivating characters, and the sprawling, dystopian world of Midgar all contributed to its status as a timeless classic.
For many, "Final Fantasy VII" represents not only a game but a cherished memory, a gateway to the world of role-playing games, and a journey filled with unforgettable moments. The sheer depth of emotional connection and nostalgia that surrounds the original game is difficult to overstate. It's a title that's as much a part of gaming's cultural fabric as it is a beloved pastime.
Fast forward to 2020, and Square Enix released the highly anticipated "Final Fantasy VII Remake." With modern graphics, voice acting, and expanded gameplay mechanics, it's undeniable that the remake captured the hearts of many. The updated visuals, in particular, brought the world of Midgar to life in ways that fans could only dream of in 1997.
However, as the "Final Fantasy VII Remake" saga unfolds with multiple entries and expanded storylines, some players have grown concerned. The once-standalone adventure is now stretched across different games, and the episodic nature, coupled with the need to purchase each installment, has led to accusations of Square Enix milking the series for profits. While some welcome the deeper exploration of the beloved narrative, others feel their wallets are being drained to experience the full story. The controversy surrounding the remake reminds us of the delicate balance between honoring nostalgia and the realities of modern gaming economics.
We all remember the pixelated corridors of hellspawn and adrenaline-pumping, demon-slaying action. When we think of the gaming landscape in the '90s, the original "Doom" series inevitably takes a prominent spot. These titles, crafted by id Software, set the bar for first-person shooters and established the foundation for a genre that continues to thrive today.
Nostalgia flows abundantly when discussing the early "Doom" titles. Those who experienced the pioneering days of 1993, when the first "Doom" was unleashed, recall the thrill of mowing down hordes of demons with a shotgun and the satisfaction of finding secret passages. "Doom II: Hell on Earth" followed in 1994, expanding on the frenetic gameplay and delivering an iconic gaming experience that remains unmatched.
However, as we transition to the modern era, the "Doom" series appears to have lost its way. The original games' straightforward, fast-paced action has been replaced by a somewhat convoluted narrative in the 2016 reboot and its subsequent installments. While these modern entries have their merits, some fans feel that they lack the clear, visceral direction that defined the early "Doom" games.
Critics argue that id Software's focus has shifted away from what made "Doom" special in the first place—pure, unadulterated demon-slaying mayhem. Instead, it feels like the franchise has become somewhat aimless, with releases that veer into a mix of storylines, complex lore, and gimmicks. While modern "Doom" games undeniably boast stunning graphics and mechanics, they sometimes miss the mark when it comes to capturing the essence of what made the original titles so legendary.
In this journey through the annals of gaming history, we've revisited three iconic titles that have left an indelible mark on the gaming landscape. "Resident Evil 2," "Final Fantasy VII," and the classic "Doom" series have all played a significant role in shaping the world of video games, and their nostalgia remains as potent as ever.
While the allure of modern remakes and reimagining's is undeniable, there's a special place in our hearts for the originals. They evoke a sense of nostalgia that transports us back to a time when gaming was simpler yet no less thrilling. These retro games, in their pixelated glory and lo-fi soundscapes, continue to captivate our imaginations.
If you're looking to relive the magic of these classic titles or expand your own collection of vintage games, consider visiting Retro Gaming of Denver. With a treasure trove of retro gaming gems, they cater to enthusiasts and collectors alike, providing an opportunity to recapture the joys of gaming's golden era.
So, whether you're on a quest to find that elusive cartridge, seeking to rekindle the flames of nostalgia, or simply curious about the classics that inspired today's gaming wonders, Retro Gaming of Denver welcomes you to embark on your own retro gaming adventure. It's a journey that connects us to the past while reminding us of the enduring magic of gaming's roots.
Video games are inextricably linked to technological progression. Designers have always been and will always be limited in some way by the boundaries of the hardware and interface they are creating the game for. Understandably, the idea of making games that utilize 3D space was an enticing idea when it was becoming more feasible in the 1990s. 3D gaming truly began to take off in the era of the N64 and PS1, where it was considered the hot new thing. By comparison, 2D games were often looked down on as feeling antiquated and. Perspectives are a bit more balanced now, with most people accepting that there will always be room for both 2D and 3D games, as they offer fundamentally different experiences. But during this new advent, many publishers were eager to bring their successful franchise into this new dimension. Some franchises fared better than others, and some took a very, very long time to make the leap into 3D, if they ever even did at all. This article will focus on taking a very abridged look at some of those transitions from 2D to 3D, and what changed in the process.
Early Experiments
The new frontier of designing 3D games was the Wild West. Everyone was trying to make something functional and fun with the tools they had, and some worked better than others. When bringing “classic” franchise Bubsy into the 3rd dimension (in this case, the word “classic” just means “old”), the designers used what was more or less a brutalist approach for a system to move and jump in a 3D world. The camera was locked squarely behind Bubsy and would swing downward sickeningly in an attempt to let you see where you are going to land. Super Mario 64, on the other hand, used a more intuitive system of untethering Mario’s movements from the viewpoint, allowing him to move in any direction while the camera could move independent of him. The concept of a free-moving 3D camera was so new that Nintendo decided to anthropomorphize the concept by making the camera an actual character (a Lakitu with a camera on a fishing pole) that was present in the level following Mario around. This would become the norm after some other games had some additional growing pains with tanks controls of one type or another.
Shifting Genres
Some designers made concessions since 3D assets were exponentially more complicated to design and animate than most 2D ones. While many 2D games contained many levels with unique environments, some very influential early 3D games decided to make it a priority to get as much bang for their buck out of their levels. 2D Mario games and others of its ilk had previously been obstacle courses in which the primary goal is to just get to the end of the level. Collectables and power ups were largely optional bonuses. But Super Mario 64 instituted a fundamental design change that pretty much codified the biggest games of the generation. Instead of dozens and dozens of short levels, the game had only 15 courses that were more open-ended and designed to be traversed multiple times. Instead of being one simple course with one goal at the end, the purpose of the game was to collect the stars that were scattered in different areas of the map. Re-entering the course to tackle another star would usually send you to a completely different corner of the level. It all still involved some amount of jumping and navigating obstacles, but the design and incentives were fundamentally different. This style of game would come to be known as a Collectathon. Many of the successful franchises that entered the 3D gaming space followed and expanded on this design formula, with some executing it better than others. Numerous older franchises eventually made their way into 3D using some variation of this design philosophy, including Earthworm Jim, Rayman, and Donkey Kong. Donkey Kong 64 built off of the formula Rare had previously implemented in the Banjo Kazooie games, and stretched it to its limits with numerous collectables, some of which could only be picked up by specific characters. Collectathons went strong for many years before fizzling out a bit during the Xbox 360/PS3 era. Though they have had something of a renaissance lately, with some high-profile releases like Super Mario Odyssey, Yooka-Laylee, and A Hat in Time building off of the established base. Numerous smaller indie projects also seek to re-collect that magic.
Some other franchises also saw fit to shift genres when entering 3D. Ninja Gaiden went from being combat platformers to full-on Hack n’ Slash games focused squarely on combat. Castlevania also followed this trend with the Lords of Shadow games, largely abandoning the exploration and upgrade-based world gating that the 2D entries still use in favor of a combat focus.
Faithful Translations
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time is still often labeled as one of the best games of all time. Much of its praise is due to the fact that it took the adventurous spirit of the previous games in the series and adapted it into a 3D format that was more immersive and dramatic than ever. Sure, there was less freedom in the order you could tackle the game compared to older entries; but the game still felt like a Zelda adventure at its core. OoT is probably the perfect encapsulation of why people were so excited for 3D games. The promise of familiar characters and worlds being brought one step closer to reality was very enticing. One of the smartest features the game introduced to help players manage tracking enemies in 3D was Z-Targeting, which locked the camera on a specific point and let Link sidestep around it, letting the player make accurate attacks and dodges. Lock-on targeting systems are still ubiquitous in many games featuring 3rd-person melee combat.
After Super Metroid became a bona fide classic on the SNES, the Metroid franchise skipped the N64 completely outside of a few guest appearances in other games. Despite initial skepticism towards its first-person perspective when it was revealed, 2002’s Metroid Prime was lauded as a faithful and smart evolution of the franchise's core ideals and design. Many future games would take inspiration from how it brought the exploration, upgrades, and progression systems into 3D in ways that made sense. It wasn’t an exact 1:1 translation of Metroid’s mechanics, but it almost perfectly encapsulated its spirit. Recent releases like Returnal and Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order owe a lot to what Metroid Prime pioneered.
While Mario pioneered the evolution from course-clearing to collectathon, he has also had a few successful forays into 3D course-clear design. The Super Mario Galaxy games were something of a middle ground between the two designs; but Super Mario 3D Land and its sequel, Super Mario 3D World, were true translations of the classic “get to the flagpole” Mario level design. These are basically true Mario platformers, but this time in a linear 3D world that allows for omni-directional movement and requires little, if any, camera control from the player.
Kirby is by far one of the latest bloomers when it comes to making the jump to true 3D. The pink puffball had only dipped his toes into 3D with some spinoffs like Kirby Air Ride or Kirby’s Blowout Blast. But he fully took the plunge with Kirby and the Forgotten Land in 2022. The game is essentially the classic Kirby formula, but in a very accessible 3D world.
Nintendo is mostly known for being a family-friendly company that creates heroic characters with integrity. However, it takes all sorts to make a world. Here are some of the characters from further down the other side of the spectrum. Not quite overtly villainous, but real unpleasant fellas, nonetheless.
The Dog (Duck Hunt)
Belittling, degrading speech has no place in family relationships. Families should provide a supportive, loving environment to help each other through their toughest moments. And this dog did not get the memo. When a whole flock of ducks escapes because of your poor aim, he doesn’t offer a friendly “That’s okay. You’ll get ‘em next time”. No. He points at you and laughs in your face. But I guess this all begs the question: does your character, the duck hunter themself, deserve this treatment? Maybe his life at home is a nightmare, and the dog is just so fed up with whatever you do to him that he must take these little potshots whenever he can, just so he can feel some semblance of regaining his agency, consequences be darned. Maybe the dog is not the scoundrel. Maybe YOU are the scoundrel. Just something to think about.
CEO’s Son (Good Job!)
In the Nintendo-published Good Job! you take on the role of the very embodiment of corporate nepotism. You play as the son of the nameless company’s CEO, where you bumble your way through every department in the building. Along the way, you disrupt and endanger your fellow workers, smash priceless items and work equipment, and show flagrant disregard for the dress code by donning a myriad ridiculous outfit. It’s possible to do a “Good Job” and complete your work in an efficient manner that wouldn’t make a worker’s comp lawyer salivate. But just like the character we are forced to play as, we as players are just dropped into scenarios involving heavy machinery and precision work that we are not properly trained for and are therefore woefully underqualified for the tasks assigned to us. With this setup, most of us will inevitably make some massive oopsies. Regardless of how awful your performance is, you will be forcibly dragged up the corporate ladder with promotion after promotion, if only to get the other employees out of his direct line of fire. If he’s in an executive office, at least the son is less of an immediate threat of bodily harm towards the employees. He’ll probably just mess up their pensions or send the company into bankruptcy.
Louie (Pikmin series)
Louie first appeared in Pikmin 2 and has gone on to appear in every subsequent mainline Pikmin game. And in each new appearance, his unsavory traits increased exponentially. Louie is the main reason for writing this article and the single biggest obstacle to keeping the language in it at a PG level.
From the moment he was introduced in Pikmin 2, Louie was making protagonist Olimar’s life miserable. Olimar had just returned from a harrowing experience of being stranded on a hostile alien planet. The moment he lands, he learns that the company is in financial jeopardy. This is because Louie ate an entire shipment of precious foodstuffs and then lied about it. Before even getting to take a shower or see his family, Olimar is immediately tasked with returning to the planet with the lying little jerk to collect treasure to pay off the company’s debt.
In Pikmin 3, the menace in a spacesuit is again encountered by your group of playable Koppaites. Even though they save his life from a creature and offer him sanctuary on their ship, he steals most of their food supply and runs off into the wilds, necessitating his rescue again. At least this time, it’s more to rescue the foodstuffs he stole than it is to salvage his valueless person.
SPOILERS FOR PIKMIN 4 AHEAD
Louie once again appears in Pikmin 4, showing off his stupid, empty-headed stare and droning, monosyllabic speech. With the improved graphics of Pikmin 4, his face has more detail than ever before, and is therefore more punchable than ever. I cannot properly describe the mix of frustration, anxiety, and unbridled rage that welled up in me when this dumb jerk reared his ugly head again. Initially assigned to rescue his coworker Olimar, he quickly lost interest like the self-centered jerk he is and went off to find food. He takes on the role of main antagonist in this one, endangering the lives of multiple castaways and numerous Pikmin because of his selfish, food-obsessed ideals. He actively works against your efforts to rescue the castaways stranded on the planet and has a major role in the final boss fight. Louie has truly transformed from a selfish, annoying liability into a full-fledged villain. There’s a small, small part of me that wishes I could sympathize with him, because he almost certainly has some kind of emotional handicap or developmental disorder that prevents him from connecting with his fellow man on a personal level. But his repeated offenses that endanger the lives and livelihoods of everyone around him are just too much for me to overcome. Now, I only wish there was an option to feed him to a bulblax before leaving the planet.
(Dis)Honorable Mentions
These characters aren’t exactly scoundrels; they may even have positive, heroic traits. But they are nonetheless each incredibly annoying in their own way.
Slippy Toad (Star Fox series)
A loud, obnoxious, and incompetent liability to the Star Fox team. Constantly needs rescuing.
Navi (The Legend of Zelda)
Hey! Listen! We know where we must go. Please stop reminding us every five minutes.
Baby Mario (Mario Kart series)
The fault here is less on the kid, and more on the gross lack of parental oversight that led to an unlicensed baby driving a kart in the first place.
